Parental Alienation is Real

 

The trickery of parental alienation will be revealed.  Nothing can remain a secret forever!  This is especially true with PAS.

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They DO KNOW…… Don’t fool yourself by thinking their just kids and they’ll never know. They see EVERYTHING!  They KNOW what you did. They know you lied….. about…… EVERYTHING!

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#171, Parental Alienation is Real

Be the Bigger Person

 

The time is never too late to do the right thing!

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Be the bigger/ better person. Don’t teach your child to hate their other parent. It’s time to do the right thing. Put your kids and their best intetest first. STOP fighting & start co parenting! Kids need both parents! Please help us raise awareness….

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Shared on Supporters of Shared Parenting Headquarters, May 26, 2015

#170, Be the Bigger Person

Real Parents

 

Real parents vs. parents who engage in tactics of parental alienation.

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REAL PARENTS don’t keep their children from the other parent “Parental Alienation is about parents who place their own selfish needs above those of their defenseless children and in doing so, they deny them their right to love and be loved by both parents.” ~ Dr. Reena Sommer

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Parental 

#169, Real Parents

I Don’t Want to Listen

 

This artist depicts divorce within the framework of parental conflict.  From the child’s perspective they do not want to listen.  

The artist comments: “Divorces, divorces everywhere.”

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I dont want to listen m

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Deviant Art, I don’t want to listen, by Kaiwerewolf.

Link to artwork: http://www.deviantart.com/art/I-don-t-want-to-listen-252171468

#167, I Don’t Want to Listen

Most Parents Do Not Realize…

 

Divorce is a tumultuous event for everyone in the family.  An adult child of divorce sends a message to parents on the impact of divorce on the child.   

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Most parents don’t realize what they put their children through when they get a divorce and separate. They don’t realize how much it troubles a young child’s mind, especially because as a result of the divorce, parents are usually too involved with themselves to realize anything’s wrong with their children. They become self-absorbed and lose track of what’s really important, seeking to find another mate as fast as possible, no matter whether it be for personal happiness or believing the child needs a replacement parent. Most parents, at least from what I’ve heard and experienced, don’t notice that their child is troubled and needs comfort. The child feels abandoned, becomes hateful, guilty, depressed, any plethora of emotions could result and in seeking attention, the child lashes out, often times in ways that ultimately hurts their self.

People shouldn’t marry unless their positive of their chosen partner. They especially shouldn’t have children unless they’re confident about the person they’re with and the life they are making. There is enough suffering in the world that such a simple thing should be easy enough to avoid. It’s a matter of faith and trust in one’s significant other and their life together. Children shouldn’t be made to suffer because of parents’ mistakes. Parents, if at any point they feel like their relationship is failing, they should do everything in their power to work it out before putting their children through such an ordeal. When two people have a child, that child should always come first.

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#166, Most Parents Do Not Realize

Let’s Fall in Love

 

DIVORCE!   Children learn about relationships by watching their parents.  Divorce takes a toll on your child’s perspective on how to interact in relationships.  This discloses the true impact of divorce!  On future generations!

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Lets fall in love m

 

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Link to pic: http://media-cache-ec0.pinimg.com/736x/a9/03/59/a903595b202a3568571de4cba20a2daf.jpg

# 165,  Let’s Fall in Love

Family Law Court Reform

 

Family Law court reform is a topic deserving of attention.  The Father’s Rights Movement shares important information.  

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I believe the gift of parenting children is the single greatest blessing and experience an individual can enjoy in life. Therefore to me, parenting rights are not a “special rights” concern; they are a “human rights” concern.

So, I want to ask where you stand on an important political issue: Family Law Reform.

As you may or may not be aware, our current system of Family Law has devolved into one in which a whole host of Family Court Industry players are profiteering from the minimization or elimination of parenting time and rights for non-custodial parents.

Many custodial parents, lawyers, parenting plan evaluators, supervised parenting services, States, friends of the Court social workers, many Courts, and others; are making money by using children as an excuse to exploit non-custodial parents, causing irreparable harm to both children and their parents in the process.

I, and a rapidly growing base of many others, would like this to stop. More specifically, we are asking for five primary reforms to Family Law:

The presumption of 50/50 custody and parenting rights during and after divorce. We are NOT asking for a REQUIREMENT of 50/50, because we still want parents to be able to decide for themselves what works best for them. However, in the event that case goes to trial, instead of having the NCP being forced to rise to a high standard to show why they should have time with their children, I believe it’s far healthier (for both parents and children) for the parent contesting this time to be required to rise to a high standard to show why the NCP should NOT have equal time with their children. And while this may dramatically hit the financial accounts of those who are using children for profit by creating or aggravating conditions of conflict, this reform will affect far healthier outcomes for families.

I would like reforms to child support calculations. More specifically, an elimination of financial incentives for minimizing or eliminating a non-custodial parent’s time with their little ones. As it sits now, there are basically two pieces to the child support calculation: (1) An actual physical needs worksheet, and (2) A tax-free income redistribution; with the Court establishing the higher of the two as the child support order. I recognize that custodial parents may need some time to adjust after divorce, and I have no problems with alimony/maintenance. However, I would like the alimony portion of child support to be eliminated. If a CP wants to better their lifestyle, they can put the work into bettering themselves just like NCP’S are often admonished to do. Children are NOT tax-free income producing assets, and NCP’s are NOT indentured servants.

Reforms to child support enforcement: If one wants to accomplish a goal, it helps establish good or helpful conditions to achieve that goal. Unfortunately, the Family Court has become accustomed to pathological and often draconian measures for enforcement in which the civil rights of NCP’s are systematically ignored or eliminated through administrative court procedures. If a person loses their job, or becomes ill or disabled, it makes no sense what so ever, to take away their driver’s license, vocational license, destroy their credit, throw them in jail, or force them into homelessness. How does this help to ensure the support gets caught-up? It doesn’t. It simply makes the problem worse and sets the non-custodial parent up for future, life-destroying failures. Truthfully, current regimes for enforcement that treat “deadbroke” parents as common criminals are completely inappropriate.

Social Security Act, Title IV, Part D, Section 458 “Incentive Payments To States”: I have no problem, in theory, with states being rewarded for child support enforcement. However, I have a big problem with States profiting from it, and a REALLY big problem with the lack of resources available to NCP’s for visitation enforcement. For little or no cost, a CP can have the state pursue civil or criminal remedies for delinquent child support. However, an NCP in reality, must hire an attorney if his or her visitation orders are being ignored, and often, these orders are not enforced with anywhere near the same severity by the Court as they are with child support orders. And I’m confident this is happening in large part, due to the financial interests of those parties noted above. Therefore, if there is going to be Federal incentives for the enforcement of Family Court orders, I want equal weighting and importance put the enforcement of visitation orders. Honestly, the message that money is more important than a parent’s relationship and the emotional well-being of children is remarkably disgusting. I simply can’t tolerate that kind of worldview.

VAWA reform. I agree that victims of abuse and violence need the ability to feel safe in swiftly seeking the protection of the Justice system. However, fraudulent allegations of abuse made during Family Court are getting out of control. This is a gender-neutral problem, and it seems it now boils down to which party can launch this nuclear attack first. There are no remedies available to the victims of fraudulent allegations – none, and the damage these allegations cause to both children and parents is catastrophic. The American Bar Association loves to fall back on VAWA as its reasoning for opposing any kind of Family Law reform. However, I can’t help but wonder how much money attorneys and investigators are making from a law that allows someone to be accused of such a serious crime and presumed guilty of it with no credible evidence what-so-ever. Something needs to be done about this, right now.

In short, much of the current political and judicial rationalizing for the current structure of Family Law centers on the concept of what’s “in the best interests of the children”. However, what is becoming increasingly clear is that children are simply being used as a seemingly noble excuse to mask a greedier underlying motive that is causing significant and irreparable harm to parents and children alike.

I understand you can expect to receive significant resistance to my ideas for reform because those parties noted earlier have a great deal to lose when they take place.

However, I’m not concerned about them. I’m concerned about the health and well-being children and parents, and your position on this matter will affect my voting behavior going forward.

Therefore, I will be grateful if you will tell me, in plain and simple words, where you stand on Family Law Reform.

Thank you so much for your time.

Respectfully,

The Fathers’ Rights Movement

 

#164, Family Law Court Reform

Two Houses

 

Keep in mind that one theory in artwork of divorce involves that the parent draws the picture.  The parent portrays the child’s perspective as to what they want to see their child experiencing.  Is that the case here?

Either way: This sophisticated art work shows a common theme of two houses; one with mom and  a house with dad.  The overall presentation is happy and colorful indicating adjustment to the divorce and perhaps, parents who work together.  

Dad’s house is much larger-is this the reality of dad’s home or what the child has been led to believe? There are two doors on dad’s house indicating ________???  Stairs on the side of dad’s house lead to something?  The awning on dad’s house may indicate protection.

A happy girl in the center completes the picture!

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Child art m d house pink m

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#163, Two Houses

Emotional Support

 

Emotional support offered.   A parent who has experienced the pain and heartache of PAS gives insightful backing to another parent in the throes of PAS.

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I just wanted to post on your wall, and hope that your friends and everybody else see’s this. Parental alienation is a serious matter, it’s so unfortunate that so many fathers (mothers) have to be alienated from their children, and speaking from experience (being an alienated child) I know the pain, and the severity of the situation. It is unjust, and cruel, and no one should have to live without their parent/child because of someone else who is selfish by nature, and feels the need to subjugate their children because of their own negative emotions, that they cannot separate from the situation, and see just how vast the damage is, that is being done. Not only does the alienated parent have to get up everyday without their child, children are also suffering, and we all know the facts about what happens when a child feels as though one parent doesn’t want them (which sadly happens a lot of times because they cannot fathom why their father isn’t in their lives, especially young ones who cannot see the truth)

Though, I want every single father (or mother) to know who is reading this, who has a child that is separated from them. No matter what kind of hostility that is being instilled in their minds, no matter how they even react to a situation, their hearts beat a different tune. They may be influenced vastly by the parent that is alienating them, but their hearts speak a different story – they still love you, they still care, and because of the harrowing situation they don’;t understand. They are being manipulated and despite what their minds are telling them, what they are being taught – they can never eradicate the love they have in their hearts for you. Speaking from experience, they miss you, they love you, and they are being taught to hate, to be hostile – this is not who they are deep down. No matter what, don’t stop fighting, because there are happy endings. You cannot manipulate somebody forever, eventually they will see the truth, and it will come back and bite the one who did the wrong..

#162,  Emotional Support