Author Archives: Shared Parenting Confessional

Divorce is Murder

July 5, 2015 By in All Confessions, Parental Experiences

 

The artists shares “the title is more rough. but it’s just the reality. i’ve seen way too many ppl get hurt and suffer their own or their parents’ divorce (and all that the junk it pulls along with it). heck, it’s become a ‘normal’ thing and you can see it everywhere, everyday. it’s wrong. you’d think ppl would realize that. and i don’t accept lame excuses. it’s cowardly, to think you can outrun your ‘problems’ like that. marriage is a promise, and you can’t back out on that. not with any legal stuff… i’m lucky to see my parents have a great marriage and still living together. however my friends aren’t. i really feel bad for any one having to go through all that. it’s become one of those secret fears you hope you never have to experience.”

Well said!

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Deviant art divorce is murder m

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Deviant Art: Divorce is Murder by mi2x

Link to artwork: http://www.deviantart.com/art/divorce-is-murder-199212461

#213, Divorce is Murder

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Total Despair

July 5, 2015 By in All Confessions, Artwork About Child, Impact on Child

 

A powerful depiction of divorce from the child’s perspective.  This picture produces strong emotions.  Artists’ comment: “A picture is worth a thousand words.”

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Deviant art child with pic p crying m divorce_by_wolfman007

 

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Deviant Art: Divorce by wolfman007

Link to artwork: ww.deviantart.com/art/Divorce-72296385

#212, Total Despair

True

July 5, 2015 By in Adult Children of Divorce, All Confessions

 

An adult child of divorce (parents divorced at age 8) shares her hope to have the happy days back, “when we were together happily.”

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Deviant art mom and dad true m

 

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Deviant Art:  Divorce by AkatsukiFan112

Link: http://akatsukifan112.deviantart.com/art/Divorce-215765801

#211, True

A Tender Moment

July 4, 2015 By in All Confessions, This is Shared Parenting

 

Everyone likes to be acknowledged.  In challenging  situations, the positive words from a stranger can have special meaning. Here is a heart- warming story about a stranger offering emotional support and recognizing the efforts of a devoted parent.  Indeed, this moment will have life-long implications for both individuals.

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Tonight at a conference my eyes were drawn to a Father sitting next to us who had three young sons in his care. Probably ages 12, 9 & 7.
I watched on as I was amazed at the affection this Father showed for his sons.
No matter what they asked him, he gave each one his full attention. He kissed & hugged them continually.
I was wondering why I was so drawn to know his story. Where was Mum? Was he a single Dad? Did his wife pass away? I wasn’t sure but I’m eyes were transfixed on his love for them, and also the love the eldest son showed for his younger brothers.
When the conference finished I felt to tell him “he’s a great dad and that he needed to hear that”
As I walked past I leant down to his ear and said “I want you to know I was watching you with your boys, your a wonderful Father”
You should have seen his face light up. It was like he was shocked and then again so happy at that comment.
“Thank you” he said…
As I left the Auditorium I told my husband what I said and he also said he was going to say the same thing.
Ten minutes later my husband ran into him again where we were all picking up our kids.
He walked up to my husband and just asked how our night was.
I then approached their conversation and this man still intrigued me.
“What was his story we wondered?”
As my husband asked him where he was from and about the kids, he started to tell us how he brought his 5 kids (yes he also had 2 Girls) down from Brisbane for this 1 week conference. That he wanted more than anything to give his kids the joy of experiencing this and to have this time with them.
My ears starting to tune in, I was starting to feel I think I do have a single Dad here.
Then he drops the penny.
He hadn’t seen his kids in 3 months, they live further away from him, he’s in a messy court battle with his ex, he’s been told he’s not a good father and the story goes on.
I knew it. God works in mysterious ways doesn’t he. The amount of times I have had separated/divorced parents put in my path I can’t tell you.
I put my hand on his arm and said well I do understand as you are what I write and talk about.
With my eyes filling up I shared with him what I do (Voice4kids) and he was shocked. Even he said wow, this is a God moment.
I shared with him my heart (and yes I cried) as I told him what an amazing Dad I saw in him etc…
It was such a lovely moment that my husband and I were able to witness tonight.
I told him I feel to bless him with my 2 Books and he can’t wait to receive them.
*THESE ARE MOMENTS I LIVE FOR.
*THESE ARE THE MOMENTS I PRAY FOR.
*THIS IS WHY I DO WHAT I DO.

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As shared on http://www.voice4kids Facebook page:

Link: https://www.facebook.com/voice4kidskarlalee?fref=ts&ref=br_tf

WEBSITE: http://www.karlalee.com

http://www.voice4kids

EMAIL: author.karlalee@gmail.com

#210, A Tender Moment

Live With Dad

July 3, 2015 By in All Confessions, Parental Experiences

 

In divorce, sometimes kids become upset with one parent and want to live with the other.

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Deviant art I want to live with dad m

 

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Link to artwork:http://www.deviantart.com/art/Scania-by-nature-178727479

#208,  Live with Dad

Child Support Lawyers

June 28, 2015 By in All Confessions, Family Court

 

A common theme.  

Parental conflict creates a sense of insecurity in the child.  Research shows that parental conflict can lead to a higher likelihood that the child will have emotional issues, do poorly in school and have social and relationship issues. Remember, parent’s are the child’s first and most important teachers.  A child learns about relationships from watching their parents.

Deviant art child_support_lawyers_by_whiteandass-d8yxthv

 

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Deviant Art, by whiteandass.

Link to artwork: http://www.deviantart.com/browse/all/?section=&global=1&q=child+support+lawyers

#207, Child Support Lawyers

Unwanted

June 28, 2015 By in All Confessions, Parental Experiences

 

Parent to parent. This mother gives advice to anyone thinking about divorce. She expresses emotional turmoil knowing her daughter will  also experience  the same anxiety this mom experienced during childhood due to parental conflict. This mom acknowledges the difficulty in visiting four sets of grandparents at the holidays. And, grief in knowing her daughter will live in a world of unknowns. Sadly, there is a long list of divorces among her immediate and extended family. Some parents know how the logistics of divorce will impact their child.  Yet, as the parent not wanting the divorce, she is limited. There seems to be nothing she can do to change anything…except advise parents considering divorce.  Thank you for helping, mom!

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To Anyone thinking about divorce,

The divorce was not my idea!

I hate that my daughter will grow up as I did.  Four sets of grandparents to visit at the holidays.  Anxiety at school events because her parents do not get along.

My parents are divorced.  My  brothers and sister are divorced.  Several aunts and uncles are divorced. This is what my daughter has-a family of divorces.

I regret that my daughter has to live in a world of unknowns.

I wish there was something I could do to make this better for my baby.

To all parents out there thinking about divorce.  Don’t do it!

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#206, Unwanted

 

Emotional Trauma

June 28, 2015 By in All Confessions, Artwork from Child

 

Do you wonder what kids really think about their parents’ divorce?Here are the answers to the question:  “how long does the emotional trauma of divorce last”.

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“You never get over it.”    Fifteen years after parents’  divorce

“I still haven’t.”    Twelve years after parents’  divorce

“It’s been four years but I’m still not over it.”

“It took me about seve years to really get over it.”

“I wasn’t upset at the time.  About a year later it hit and lasted for a year.”

“A few years of therapy.”

“I still haunt gotten over it.  I may never.”   Ten years after parents’  divorce

“Not long.  My dad was pretty mean.”

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Divorceandkids.com  

http://www.divorceandkids.com/Kids%20Quotes-Drawings/kids_quotes.htm#HOW%20LONG%20DOES%20THE%20EMOTIONAL%20TRAUMA%20LAST?

#205, Emotional Trauma

 

Wants to Love Both Parents

June 28, 2015 By in All Confessions, Artwork from Child

 

A child loves both parents!!!!!

Divorce is between the parents-ABOUT THE CHILD!!!!

LOVE WINS!!!   LOVE WINS!!!   LOVE WINS!!!   LOVE WINS!!!

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“Dad couldn’t really be as bad as Mom says he is.”   (9-year-old girl)

“I don’t care who I live with. I love you both. Please don’t make me choose–just tell me.”   (9-year-old boy)

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Divorceandkids.com

http://www.divorceandkids.com/Kids%20Quotes-Drawings/kids_quotes.htm#FEELING%20TORN%20BETWEEN%20PARENTS

#204, Wants to Love Both Parents

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“Dad couldn’t really be as bad as Mom says he is.”